The Anchorage Collection
Downtown Barbie
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding
or removing snap-on parts.
- Walks to work.
- Likes to "experiment," but will never commit.
- This model is being phased out and is only available directly
from the manufacturer.
Girdwood Barbie
This Barbie is made out of recycled plastic and tofu.
She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy legs and
armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks.
- She does not want or need a Ken doll, but comes with 2 large
male dogs.
- Purchase the optional Subaru wagon, and you'll also
receive a free rainbow flag sticker and a choice of a blue or
green plastic tarp.
- Available at REI.
Government Hill Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler
jeans 2 sizes too small, a classic Metallica tee shirt and a
Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder.
- She has a six pack of Budweiser and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD
set.
- She can spit over a distance of 6 feet and kick mullet haired
Ken's ass when she's drunk.
- Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a Confederate
flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
- Boyfriend Ken is in treatment.
- Available at Army Navy Surplus Stores.
Hillside Barbie
This Barbie comes with an assortment of Kate Spade
handbags. Accessories include your choice of a BMW convertible,
Hummer H2, or H3, a long haired foreign lapdog named Honey, and a
cookie cutter dream house with a "to die for" view of
the inlet.
- Also included are a Starbucks mug, credit card set, and an
Alaska Airlines Gold MPV membership.
- Available with or without tummy tuck, facelift, and boob
job.
- Workaholic, shallow, cheating husband Ken comes with a
Porsche.
- This princess Barbie is sold exclusively at Nordstrom.
Mountain View Barbie
Pregnant at purchase, this Barbie comes with a
stroller and bus pass.
- Also included is a G.E.D. Application and a completely filled
out PFD form.
- Home boy - Gangsta Ken and his '82 Caddy are
optional.
- Available at Value Village.
Muldoon Barbie
This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie comes with
a pair of high heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time
she chased Beer Gut Ken out of Government Hill Barbie's
apartment.
- Her ensemble includes low rise acid washed jeans, fake
fingernails, strawberry lip gloss and a see through halter
top.
- Comes with Barbie's Dream Double Wide Trailer.
- Available at Wal-Mart.
Southside Barbie
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a
Ford Expedition and matching Alaska Club workout ensemble. She
gets lost easily and has no full time occupation.
- Comes with Percocet prescription and Botox.
- Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
- Husband Ken is into fishing, hunting, golfing, eating, and
lusting for other women.
- Available at Costco.
Spenard Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm
handgun, switchblade knife, 1978 Chevrolet El Camino with dark
tinted windows, and a meth lab kit.
- This model is available only after dark and can only be
purchased with cash - preferably small bills, unless you're a
cop. Then we don't know what you're talking about.
- Boyfriend Ken is in jail.
- Available at many pawnshops.
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