Statements About Women
She is not a "Babe" or a "Chick" - She is a "Breasted American."
She does not have a "Killer Body" - She is "Terminally Attractive."
She does not have "Major League Hooters" - She is "Pectorally Superior."
She does not have "Breast Implants" - She is "Gravity Resistant."
She has not "Been Around" - She is a "Previously Enjoyed Companion."
She is not "Kinky" - She is an "Uninhibited Sexual Companion."
She is not "Easy" - She is "Horizontally Accessable."
She is not a "Slut" - She is "Sexually Extroverted."
She is not "Horny" - She is "Sexually Focused."
She does not "Tease" or "Flirt" - She engages in "Artificial Stimulation."
She does not "Get You Excited" - She causes "Temporary Blood Displacement."
She is not a "Screamer" or a "Moaner" - She is "Vocally Appreciative."
She is not a "Bleached Blonde" - She is "Peroxide Dependent."
She does not wear "Too Much Jewelry" - She is "Metallically Overburdened."
She does not wear "Too Much Perfume" - She commits "Fragrance Abuse."
She does not wear "Too Much Makeup" -She has reached "Cosmetic Saturation."
She is not an "Airhead" - She is "Intellectually Impaired."
She is not "Dumb" - She has made a "Detour From The Information Superhighway."
She is not "Drunk" or "Tipsy" - She is "Chemically Inconvienced."
She is not "Fat" or "Chubby" - She has achieved "Maximum Density."
She does not "Gain Weight" - She is a "Metabolic Underachiever."
She is not "Cold" or "Frigid" - She is "Thermally Inaccessable."
She is not a "Bad Cook" - She is "Microwave Compatible."
She is not "Conceited" - She is "Intimately Aware of Her Best Qualities."
She is not "Too Skinny" - She is "Skeletally Prominent."
She does not "Have a Moustache" - She is "In Touch With Her Masculine Side."
She does not "Hate Televised Sports" - She is "Athletically Ignorant."
She does not "Go Shopping" - She is "Mall Fluent."
She does not "Nag You" - She becomes "Verbally Repetitive."